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Yuki, Jonathan, Jennifer Alexia or Avanindra

[ website | My Photobucket Dress Site ]
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Selling Lolita. Baby, Innocent World and Off Brand [14 Jul 2011|01:26am]
Selling Lolita. Baby, Innocent World and Off BrandCollapse )
1.5 Billon Stars, 4 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

Workaholic [21 Mar 2009|09:17am]
So people get the spring break on, drink have fun, have sex, discover new kinks and sides of themselves, visit family or even just catch up on the 3 months of not studying.


70 hours of work in about 10 days time. Since last week was my true day off, (no school, or work from either job)

Yeah nice paycheck, but I ask myself constantly, is it worth the health, socalizing or affecting my studies?

Kinda, sometimes, not really are the answers.

Paycheck is nice... but try the pron industry. Largest industry in the world, everyone is perverted enough for it, film for a couple hours and make the money and you have residuals for life. Hell even webcam for a couple people or someone. The hours are easy, all you do is have pleasure. I wouldn't mind being a workaholic in the pron industry. Nice eh?

Anyways, yes.. work... its nice, rewarding but everyonce in a while you wanna say fuck it all and curl up in bed.
Look To The Stars

Doesn't seem worth it.... and waiting sucks..... [18 Mar 2009|05:12pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

So looking at the date, it was my sister's half birthday. In turn, mine is only 10 days away. Ill be quarter of a century old.....At first I wanted a huge sweet 16 type thing, dress as you want. Id be formal... but now I see it almost no point as, well, birthdays just seem like another day to me.... thats what I feel now. Two years ago it was nice having a huge one with friends over, but most of those i dont talk to anymore. So the crowwd I would want would not be as big as I think it would be. Besides don't know many people would actually come....

As an update, I have an interest. Not girlfriend as I havent gone on a date yet... depressing as she hasn't called me back as we have other things to discuss. Why she doesn't call back I don't know. Im trying hard not to let my paranoia take over but its hard on me repressing myself from my own normal actions. If I act apon them, I dont want to look like an obssesed stalker or something. Im just thinking and hoping for the best. Doing so at least got me to at least to asking her out and her saying yes. So, its good, just have to think more so.

1.5 Billon Stars, 1 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

(&%@#@ day ever. [24 Feb 2009|11:41pm]
So, today, of all days, had to the the crappiest one in a long time.

Dad's car got broken into, radio and what ever is gone also.
My water bottle leaked into my technology bag, all my electronics got wet, ruined my hand outs and ruined my text book.

Ok day at work, both of them. Too tired to study but I tried to get it done.

Come home, the "conversation between my mom, moves off topic from, the car because of my bad reputation and past, they don't believe me, to I dont give a flip about the house, I can't communicate with my dad, I still harbor hatred for the family, where I dont have goals to know worth of a shit of what I want to do with my life."

My defenses about everthing

The car, totally not my fault, Acura Integra, one of the HIGHEST theft and EASY target cars for anything, despite stealing a in dash radio or entire engine and transmission.

Bad reputation, don't give a flip, i've changed
The house, I live on a day by day basis.
I don't see the reason why they want to remodel the house when they're going to put all the cluttered crap back in front of it. They said they would do and deal with that first. Not my clutter, not my problem.

Can't communicate and harbor hatred, they rejected 1/2 of my personality. That is my calm, serenity, inspiration, inner strength, stability. my other half is logic, outer strength, perseverance, shield. They can not live without the other because they keep each other in check.

Calm/serenity <-> logic
inspiration <-> perseverance
Inner and outer strength
shield <-> stability

my logic can go overboard, but me being too calm makes too many logical mistakes
I inspire myself due to what I don't let bother me, but in turn, if I just give up cause I have other things to look up too and not finish whats the point.
Mind and body go in one. Can't have the mentality to think you look good if you don't keep yourself physically set where you want to be.
I can take a lot of crap but with out the balance it will be returned in unhealthy doses. In turn, If I dont protect myself, I can throw my own stability off.

I can't predict my future if I don't take care of whats happening now. I live day by day... not even concerned with Thursday. Apparently to my mom, I'm a lost person and I dont know what i'm doing.

i don't really care if someone thinks as this as selfish, nor the point I didn't have time to cool off. I've been collective the entire day.

Now, feel like I betrayed someone cause of something, great... now my emotions are everywhere, I dont know what to think and i've lost a whole 1 1/2 hours on study.... great.......
1.5 Billon Stars, 2 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

Sick and getting sicker. [26 Jan 2009|02:32pm]
I like the fact I dont get sick.
I hate the fact I dont get sick.

A small sore throat has turned into a prolong cold to where I can't breath for 1/2 a sec at random times. The usual crap, but mixed in with my sleep apena, im waking up every hour during the night and basic functions, such as typing and memory, are affecting me.

What does this mean overall?
High Irritability
High emotional drains which include depression, unwilling to do thing, or don't give a crap emo attitude.
High rate of nodding off to sleep
No intention of eating, thus forcing myself to do so.

Well, sleeping is good.
I was going to go Circuit City but I really don't want to fight traffic and most electronics I can get way cheaper due to the fact I have a friend who works in Fry's.

I apologize to the friends who can read this, as I might seem like an asshole, depressed ranting about things I have for the longest time and there's also apologizes that I can't do anything as I'm forcing myself to stay home and get well because this is one crap ass way to start the new year.

Oh yeah, I dont have internet at the house till tuesday. >_<

Btw, Happy Chinese New Year

1.5 Billon Stars, 2 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

Day 2 of School [21 Jan 2009|09:51am]
So Day 2, and I'm still sick.

So error this morning, Apparently I made a payment, but I didn't do it under the payment plan. Whichever monies I did pay, the system didn't drop, which only ended up being 2 out of my 6 classes. Thank goodness I checked this morning to see what time I was supposed to be in class. So, in turn, I did drop a class.
1. So I wouldn't have an overload, jumping from my normal 12 to 18 hours.
2. It conflicted with my work on Monday anyways.

Score is now
UH 1, Yuki 1, Yuki's Sickness 2.

I just have to tell my manager my mornings are going to switch. That is fine with me, get up early in the beginning of the week, then slowly back off and play more towards the end. I hope she can do the same and accompany the schedule switch. I just have to work the rest of next week, then make the switch.
Look To The Stars

[16 Jan 2009|12:14am]
meme stolen from lil_panda

I will sketch for the first five people who comment with their request. The catch is that you must put this up in your journal as well. If you absolutely do not draw, write something, make a mix tape, etc.

Why not?
1.5 Billon Stars, 8 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

Hesitiation to respond. [14 Jan 2009|01:29am]
Do you ever get that deep depression, you know there are people you like, but you know due to certain circumstances, whether its your doing or other outside factors, you don't act upon them either due to the factors or respect? Thinking of the consequences, you fear them?
1.5 Billon Stars, 4 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

2009 Anime Convention Schedule [08 Jan 2009|10:27pm]
6-8 - Ikkicon 3 - Convention Vice Chair

10-12 - Kamikaze Con - Guest Relations Head

A-Kon - Vendor - Lady Heather's Fashions

Pending Dates

Atsuicon - Dealer's Liaison
Oni-Con - Registration Head
Otakon - Vendor - Lady Heather's Fashions
1.5 Billon Stars, 1 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

One year ago... reflection..... [08 Jan 2009|10:15pm]
One year ago... I was going downhill, mentally... becoming more unstable by the day.


I'm doing better. I have two ideal jobs. Working at Gamestop, and the Hilton, which I'm liked.
trying to make friends with new people.

What inspired me to write? I dont know, just want to. Maybe need to reorganize life and make it work better by writing things down. Almost didn't make the grades last semester because I didn't write a stupid thing.

Anyways, bai!
1.5 Billon Stars, 1 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

4 days till my birthday. [24 Sep 2008|11:02am]
I'm glad most have power back, except one of my friends, who still doesn't have anything let alone, wont for awhile.

Updated Damage Report:
Roof downgraded from leaks to TOTALED. The adjuster authorized a full roof replacement.
Hallway Carpet Damaged, might move to hardwood. Just feeling hard carpet without the joy of foam.
One annoying co-worker's dog to take care of, is now gone!
Gas is still getting back to being expensive....

Once again, Gawd I miss work.... I need money for Yaoi-con! >_< The carpet has been replaced in the store, but whats left is the mold problem. I'm not looking forward to the massive amount of boxes we have to process when we get in. Missed I don't know how many releases....

My birthday is around the corner, well Sunday to be more exact. I do hope that something can be done... ummm surprise birthday or maybe I can have a birthday at someone's house. The day my parents leave is too far away so... we'll see I guess.
1.5 Billon Stars, 1 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

Post Hurricane [16 Sep 2008|11:12am]
I'm back and I have full power, water and internet at the home, provided we don't get hit with the occasional rolling black out.

Damage Report:
Roof Leaking
Hallway Carpet Damaged
One annoying co-worker's dog to take care of
Running low on gas

If I had the house to myself, I would invite people over. Now, that I have internet and the such, I haven't been greedy. I've been helping people with travel with Houston, where the Points of Distirbution are, checking up on the store, been trying to arrange carpool. I'm still trying to do my good.

Everyone has different communications, Text, Livejournal, Facebook, Myspace... so hard but its good to hear about people still ok.

Gawd I miss work.... I need money for Yaoi-con! >_
Look To The Stars

Evacs [12 Sep 2008|06:33am]
Leaving for VA hospital for evac. Good luck to everyone else and stay safe
Look To The Stars

Last day of August! [31 Aug 2008|05:29pm]
Last day of August. The day has been going slow. Now that's not bad. I've spent half of the day playing Ratchet and Clank. Now now, not any of the old ones, the newest one for the PS3. Yes! I finally got my PS3! Whats even nicer is its the rare 60gb model!

The half of the day has been consisting of just cleaning. I've been getting some of the junk out of my room. Do they pick up the trash on labor day? At least I can access two of my bookshelves again.

I need to start selling things to make room and money. Too bad the postal is closed tomorrow......
meh oh wel. time to get ready for a wet week.
1.5 Billon Stars, 2 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

Four days, doing 10 times better!!! [25 Aug 2008|12:09pm]
[ mood | awake ]

I'm doing better, only a four day gap between the last entry... Well that doesn't say much from the last one where it went from 1 week difference to a 4 week gap. At least i'm doing a bit better.

Reason why I'm writing? Its the information age, no one wants to send out cards via snail mail, nor meet up. Well not as often on the latter because of conflicting schedules. I'd figure this is a good way. Since myself doesn't really keep a traditional journal and just keep all my calculations and life notes in my current journal. (of which, I tell everyone, If I ever go missing, find my blue and green journal, you will find me, because I record almost everything in the that thing) Plus it keeps me off of World of Warcraft

A lot of my friends who are in college now, despite the age or the maturity levels of life issues, still write in someway or form. I just need to keep this up. At least, I need to re-learn to slow down my thoughts, because my typing can't keep up most of the time, and I end up with gaps in my sentences.

/being morning rant (LJ better not think this is some coding for a rant, or at least cut out the first part.)

Ever since they took away the business parking lot for the the new grad dormitories, garage traffic has been horrendous. Took about near 20 min to bypass the normal signal and outlaying parking lot traffic. I should have left an hour early to make it to class. No one wants to park as where no one would park normally and everyone is so acrophobic, they want to park as close to the ground as possible. The traffic for the second gates was so bad, they said screw it and opened the second set so no one would have to sit through verifications and the such. I was already coming late 10 to my first class. My phone vibration is so loud, because a friend called me after seeing him on the road. When I turned on my compy, the stupid cursed windows start up went off. At least the teacher kinda knows me and just kept going. At least I wasn't in a dress this time, didn't have time. Stupid wireless in my laptop can't pick up anything anymore, unless I'm about 20 feet from a router. There are laptops older than mine and they can pick up the signal. Hopefully the Dell people will fix it.

Music brought to you by Dias De Los Angeles by Del Castillo from the Once Apon a Time In Mexico soundtrack.
(Bitching acoustic solos, you must listen or ask me for a copy, and music thats live that sounds damned good)

Look To The Stars

Four Weeks [21 Aug 2008|12:25am]
Four Weeks....

Working my arse off at gamestop.


Having my e-mail nearly hack but flooded with spam, I wants revenge.

Spent last free night friends before school starts.

Oh yeah, Friend went to start college in Japan. Good luck Rin-san.

1.5 Billon Stars, 4 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

Hellos Two weeks, and feeling better. [18 Jul 2008|03:11am]
So, its been another two weeks since the last update according the Livejournal Update link. This week has gone fairly well. Sunday at the improv was Christopher Titus. A brand new bit, and nothing of a repeat. His last bit, the 5th annual end of the world tour was about his marriage and his dad. This one was mostly about his divorce and finding his new girl. I could really relate and it helped me get over Tsuki (which I pray who is doing well) a lot more in the past two weeks since the break up and I could laugh about the break up with Chie. After the show, he had some new shirts with the title of his new show, "Love is Evol" I was able to get one of my friends a signed shirt because she was originally was supposed to go to me, but because of the family, she couldn't. Anyways, after I got the shirt, I didn't have anything, so I got Titus to sign my DS ^_^ I have to tape it or something to preserve the signature. Its starting to fade.

Anyways if you haven't really noticed, the update is about 3AM in the morning. No, i'm not bored, I just got back from the midnight showing of "The Dark Knight" The movie was awesome. As I thought the movie was going to end, it kept going, and it wasn't slow anywhere. Again, my opinion. Its worth it in my opinion.

Another reason i'm good in spirits, I got all pretty and dressed up. The group I went with was about 13 people. It was my co-workers from Gamestop, they're loved ones, my managers family, his roommate and two of my co-worker friend's, and one of our guys next door in the donut shop who comes over to chat between on his breaks. They all got to see me dressed up. My manager's girlfriend was excited, intrigued and really cool with me all dressed up. The girls were jealous lol. Well, it was all good. I R Happy. Thats all I can conjure up in my mind for now.

1.5 Billon Stars, 2 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

Long Time [29 Jun 2008|06:19pm]
18 Weeks.

Last time I wrote in this thing. Why so long? Well, an online blog/log/journal has its ups and downs. An up, everyone can get to know your life, and the down, everyone can get to know your life. I mostly chose not to write because if someone really wants to get to know me, they will talk, spend the time with me to get to know me. My habits my likes and dislikes. Which comes to my point. My current girlfriend, Tsuki as most know her as, has disappeared from my world.

Its been a long while since I've missed someone and not like just small thing. For me, praying, driving me up the wall, because my current girlfriend is no where to be heard from. I guess with my previous relationship of year and half, the latter 6 months I guess I really didn't mind keeping my distance. Now, I miss because of the distance. I hope that it doesn't affect my health. Now... first time in a long time, I look for hope. Not just asking please, I mean in a religious spiritual being. It must be Tsuki's influence, but she's not here... I guess the saying is true, "You don't really appreciate something until its gone."

Now most would be thinking at this point, boo hoo, like everyone else, I'm acting "emo". The detail that most don't see, this is completely out of character of Tsuki. Normally, she is one to respond, even it's hours, she always does. For me to receive the "cold shoulder" is not normal nor an expected thing. I just hope she is ok, and hoping one of the reason's is her phone is broken. Granted that is a possibility, my mind has gone into possibilities, including death. I hope she is not harmed in anyway and I hope she is well. I would just want to hear from here.
Look To The Stars

Yay!! R4!! [19 Feb 2008|10:41am]
Finally purchased my R4 for my DS. I was able to find it, just the shell and the software and the such. I also was about to find a 4gb micro SD card for about $20. W0000ts

1.5 Billon Stars, 3 Shine Bright| Look To The Stars

Free Microsoft software [19 Feb 2008|09:56am]
Though its really old software by technological standards, its a time to get free items from microsoft for once.


Look To The Stars

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